Monthly Archives: November 2012
Holiday Decorating Contest for ELA Residents
We love the holidays, and we love the way so many of you have decorated your lawns and homes for the season. So the Emerald Lakes Free Press is hosting the First Annual Emerald Lakes Holiday Decorating Contest. Yes, “holidays”. Don’t pout because we didn’t say Christmas, because we will accept entries for any holiday you choose for your theme. You can even get out your Easter decorations and put them up. As long as they are actually out and on your lawn and house on the closing date of the contest, which is December 22, 2012, it is eligible to win.
And there ARE prizes. We have a lovely gift basket, full of wine and good things to eat. We have a gift certificate from our friends at the Speakeasy Lounge. We have chocolate. You know you want this stuff!
To enter, all you have to do is send a picture of the (outdoor) decorations from this year, and send it, along with the physical address of the home, here in Emerald Lakes (we will be driving around the check!), and the name of the homeowner or resident who did the decorating to firstname.lastname@example.org. We will post these as soon as we get to them, and the voting opens immediately, so enter as soon as you can. You can enter your own home, or nominate a neighbor, it’s all up to you.
To vote for your favorite, all you have to do is post a comment telling us which one you like best. On December 23, 2012, Buz and I will count the comments and decide who the winners are, and will announce them right here, that night.
(Here’s the legal stuff, feel free to stop reading if you don’t care: We will do our best to count the votes. We will try to count each email address only once. If we get multiple votes from the same email address, we will only count the last one we receive. If it gets really complicated, we will just give up and pick our favorites. If there is a tie, we will flip a coin. C’mon, it’s Christmas and we don’t have time to get into complicated math.)
So, get in the spirit and get decorating. We can’t wait to see what you have done.
Pa Man Claims He Never Fantasized On Lottery Win
SMALLTON, Pennsylvania (FNS) A local man has told friends and neighbors that he has never once thought about what he would do with the money if he won the lottery even though he admits he occasionally purchases tickets, especially when the prize is over $100 million. Boris Meeh, who operates a light bulb repair business out of his home in this sleepy Northeastern Pennsylvania town, says he thinks it’s a waste of time to dream of such things. “Hey, if I win, I’ll figure out what to do with the money. Why bother with dreaming? It’s just a waste of time.”
Neighbor Sue Spishus isn’t so sure. “He’s always saying stuff like that. I mean he says he never mentally undressed a woman. Claims he never wished nobody dead. You believe that? I’ll sell you that crick down yonder if you do.” But best friend Howdy Thinkit says it just might be true. “Bo is a different sort of guy. You know, he told me he’s never masturbated. That’s pretty unusual around these parts. I mean, there ain’t much to do on Saturday nights. Or any other nights, if you get my drift. And another thing, he says he never, ever thought about what happens to you after you die. So, just maybe, he never did no thinkin’ on winning the big one. I sure have, though.”
“Party House” – Another Perspective
Last month, we reported here on the concerns of some of our residents regarding the behavior of the renters and owners at a few particular homes in our community. (Read about it here and here) These residents made their case at an open board meeting, and the board members and our GM have been investigating. The Emerald Lakes Free Press has been investigating too, and we have found, as in most situations in life, there are two sides to this story.
I spoke extensively to Cari and Eric Lovelace, the owners of one of these so-called “party houses”, and they have described their anguish and upset over this characterization of their home and of their supposed lack of concern for what goes on there and in ELA.
At the most recent board meeting, President Al Leslie reported that Read the rest of this entry
Ten Things We Don’t Need Anymore
2. Car Phones
With the news of the abuse of HOAs around the country, it is more important than ever to protect your rights and your investment in your home. Please, create an account and sign the petition.
Ward Lucas & The HOA Hell Blog
LOL! Forgive me, but I’m corrupt enough to use any kind of inflammatory headline to get you to read deeper. And no, of course you are not dummies…UNLESS you refuse to consider signing the petition to the White House composed by George Staropoli, a man who is a giant in the world of HOA reason and Constitutionalism.
The left is all abuzz about a few on the right who are proposing seceeding from the Republic because of the results of the last election. First, those well-meaning people have an absolute right to propose secession to express their opinion. Second, secession won’t work, that’s what national elections are all about. If you don’t like it, vote for someone new in the next election. Just change it.
But the third point is a whopper! And it took someone of Staropoli’s clear-headed thinking to come up with it.
Homeowners Associations, as private non-profit corporations, preside…
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Ten Really Annoying People
1. Donald Trump
2. Infomercial hosts/hostesses
3. Adam Sandler
4. Sidewalk preachers
Inside the Obama ‘Ground Game’
By Buz Whelan
Much was made of the Obama campaign’s ‘ground game’ by analysts in the months leading up to election day. The vaunted machine was supposed to be a difference maker, yet Republicans paid little heed to the David Plouffe-designed system. On November 6th, they paid the price for that insouciance.
Obama Campaign Demands Recount
CHICAGO, Illinois (FNS) The Obama campaign, though not the President himself, is demanding a recount of the election results. Top advisors were stunned by what they judged as the closeness of the final tally and have so far refused to believe the totals. Particularly excised are the two Davids, top advisors Axelrod and Plouffe. Said Axelrod, “I can’t believe this guy got 206 electoral votes. I mean this is a party that believes life begins at last call. I’m very disappointed. I figured he might get a hundred votes, but I expected Goldwater numbers.” Strategist David Plouffe was equally surprised. “I know the polls showed it was going to be a close election, but those were from Read the rest of this entry
Please Report Storm Damage
Attention Home and Business Owners
It is important to report all Storm Sandy property damage to local municipalities/townships. These damage reports are needed for Monroe County to qualify for Hurrican Sandy disaster relief funding.
• Where to report – Your municipality or township building.
• How to report – Forms are Read the rest of this entry